Is there another me?

I finished watching The Man In The High Castle last week. The thought of Parallel Universes or Multiverses is something I find quite interesting. Could their possibly be "another me" out there living a different life? Making different divisions so on an so on?

I suppose it's possible. I wonder what his life looks like? Is he happy? Is he healthy? I wonder what the world around him looks like? Did the Nazi's win in his world? May Russia won. It's fascinating to think of the possibilities. 

I've always be enamored with the thought of time travel. I wonder if we'll ever figure how to do it?

Probably not in my life time.

Where has the time gone?

It's been almost five years since I last posted here. As you can imagine a lot has changed in 5 years.

Some for the good. Some not so much. But change none the less.

I'm 5 years older. I'd like to think I'm 5 years wiser as well. Certain days it feels like I am. Others, not so much.

I'm happier that I was when I turned 40. Really, happier than I've been in the last 25 years. So that's a positive.

They say happiness is not a destination. It's not like you get to a certain place and then you're happy. I don't know. I guess they're right. Who really knows. Happiness is fickle anyhow.

Hope to start blogging again in a regular basis.

A power shift

I'm really glad I'm not a teacher. Over the last several years its become apparent to me, the power of authority has shifted from the teachers to the students.

There is no question that teachers in certain cases have abused the authority vested in them by the school district for their own personal gain. However, as a general rule, I believe most teachers take very seriously their responsibility of protecting and educating the kids in the classroom.

It's my opinion that many of the problems in the classroom today are caused by parents who are afraid or unwilling to discipline their children at home. At times I am astonished by the absolute disregard of authority I see from today's students. As a parent I believe it's my duty to raise my children in such a way that they will show the proper respect to those who are in charge. Especially when it comes to dealing with the teachers in their school.

I want to clarify that I would never condone a teacher physically abusing a student. They have no right to lay their hands on someone else's child. However, they do have the authority to control their classroom to insure students are provided a safe and secure learning environment. They should be able to do to this without the fear have of losing their job because one student got their feelings hurt while being disciplined.

As I said at the very start of this post I'm very glad that I'm not a teacher.

The ice covered bridge should have been a sign

I award this day the following:

What a crappy day. (pun intended)

I normally try to maintain a positive attitude regardless of my current situation but today was truly a challenge. Being in sales you are always going to have your ups and downs, but today seemed to be down, down and down some more. I'm hoping I've reached the bottom and I'm about to hit an upswing. Lord knows I could use it.

How hard a day has it been you ask? 

I'm drinking wine straight from the bottle.

Tomorrow will be better. I'm expecting a shipment of new cigars to arrive which should bring some cheer into the day.

Why would they do that?

A quick rant: I saw a commercial today on CBS for a new sitcom: "The Odd Couple." I don't understand the thinking behind a reboot on a classic. What's next, a reboot of "Cheers?" <\rant>

Today was my first day back to work after a 3 day weekend. Overall I'd say it was a semi-productive day. I've been at this job 2 years and I always struggle to get going after a two and especially 3 days weekends. However, hasn't always been that way for me. I'd like to think it's because I'm older and just don't have the stamina I used to, but that wouldn't be true.

The truth is I don't love my job. I like it and I'm good at it but I'm not passionate about it. I believe the lack of passion is what makes it so difficult to come to work excited. Don't misunderstand me though. I'm very thankful, grateful and blessed to have the job I have. It allows me to financially support my family and live a life many would gladly trade for. I  haven't lost that perspective. I just feel like there is something else out there for me. Something I could be passionate above and love doing. 

I read that Steve Jobs once said: “Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.”

I guess I'll just keep looking for the job I love. In the meantime, I'll keep doing the best I can at the job I like.

Don't Have Sex

It seems like just yesterday my daughter was just a little baby. Now she's going to the movies with her boyfriend. Bleh. 14 years have gone by in the blink of an eye. I'll readily admit I was not ready for this stage of life: Menstrual cycles and boyfriends to be very specific.

I know she is going to keep "growing up" and I might as well prepare myself for everything that comes along with "growing up." But I don't have to like it. The thought of some boy kissing my daughter makes me want to hit something (including him). But I won't. I can't. That's no way for a grown man to act. 

I haven't even met him yet. He's met my wife and the first thing he does is tell her an inappropriate joke. No respect. So needless to say I don't like him. 

Hopefully, they will break up soon. I've tried to explain to my daughter she should at least be with someone who has enough sense to be respectful to her parents. I've asked her if he is an idiot. Her reply: "Yes, he's an idiot." Great she knows he's an idiot but still wants to date him. Parenting failure. 

This has been my advice to my daughter for the last two years:

I hope it works.

Valentine's Day

I've never been big fan Valentine's Day. I held tightly to the belief Valentine's Day was nothing more than an over commercialized holiday corporations used to guilt men into spending enormous amounts of money. While part of me still believes there is some truth in that notion, I've come to the self-realization  that much of my aversion to Valentine's Day was rooted in selfishness.

For too many years of my marriage, I  allowed myself to believe  surprising my wife with a gift for no reason made me a better husband than doing something nice on Valentine's Day. In my mind, it all made sense. However, as I reflect back on the many years of forgoing a Valentine's Day celebration I realized I had also forgone the gifts for no reason.

This year I decided things were going to be different. I was going to make sure that Valentine's Day was AWESOME. I was going to surprise my wife with a night at a hotel suite, dinner at a fine restaurant and hopefully make up for my years of neglecting her on Valentine's Day. You see, the past several years our marriage has been anything but "great." We went from Husband and Wife to roommates who got along really well. It's a long back story on how we got to that point, but one day I decided it was time to changes things. I felt a huge gesture on Valentine's was the perfect way to show her how much I wanted to change things. As well intended as this ideas was, it wasn't the right path.

Once I had everything planned, booked and confirmed I told my wife of the great plans I had. It seemed to me she was totally on board with the idea. This was in late December. Three weeks before Valentine's Day she dropped a bit of a bomb on me - She didn't want to do it. She said it was "Too much, too fast." Whoa. What had I missed? How could my grand gesture be so far off the mark? What wife wouldn't apprecaite her Husband planning something like this? I was completely lost on where I went wrong.

Thankfully my wife explained to me her thinking which was: It was too much pressure for her. She felt like I expected this to fix everything in one night. Even though I never expressed those thoughts, it's how it made her feel. It took me a while to comprehend what she had shared with me. Yet, after much thought, I was able to see it from her point of view. I canceled all the plans I had made and simplified it. A nice romantic dinner close to home. Exactly what she wanted.

Last night was Valentine's Day and we had a very nice evening out. Our first Valentine's Day celebration in many years was a great success. She didn't need all the bells and whistles. She simply needed me to show I cared and I was listening to and understanding her feelings.

The last several weeks we've both expressed how hopeful we were for the future of our marriage.

Happy Valentine's Day.